The Nakodo's Apprentice
by Taritakoom
Summary: Keepin' it legal.  Sort of.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **The Nakodo's Apprentice  
><strong>Summary: <strong>The unanimous opinion - according to Lucy - is that Natsu is a clueless idiot. Who is also extremely, uh, attractive. Yeah. There's also that.  
><strong>Notes:<strong> Finals are _over_. 'nuff said.

**Disclaimer:** Nothin' but the plot.

Edit: So yeah. I guess I should triple check my writing, huh? ^^

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Lucy tapped her foot impatiently, hands crossed in front of her chest as she glowered down at her teammates.

Really, that girl was a menace when she wanted to be. Which, fortunately, was not often.

But still.

Natsu flinched. He couldn't help but notice how her hands twitched toward her trusty whip, and attempted to keep the fearful expression off his face, while, at the same time, wished Lucy wasn't so _scary_.

Lucy snorted. "What's with your face?"

Natsu ignored her jibe. Attempting to make his tone as gentle and forgiving as possible, he said, "If it's _that_ time of the month again, Luce, maybe you shouldn't come with us-"

Her eye twitched. Next to him, Gray hissed, "Idiot."

"No, you firebreathing _moron_, it's not _that time of the month_," she sneered. "And even if it was, what difference would it make? I'm perfectly capable of-"

"But Lucy-" protested Natsu.

_"No buts_," she said darkly, effectively shutting him up. "I can take care of myself, you know."

There was an uncomfortable silence following this statement, during which Natsu looked away from Lucy's livid face, trying to hold his tongue. Because she could totally take care of herself. Oh yeah. Definitely.

"_You-_!" she screeched angrily, understanding his awkward speechlessness, before turning on her dangerously tall heels rather abruptly and stomping over to the bar, where Mirajane was ready with a glass of God-knows-what and a vat of steaming-fresh gossip.

He just stared at her, bewildered. He would _never _get girls and their mysterious inner workings. If something was wrong, she should've just _spat it out_. Maybe he could avoid gawking at her like the idiot he was-

"Oi, Natsu," called Gray with an arrogant (in his opinion) smirk on his face, "Didn't Igneel teach you anything?"

His reverie forgotten almost instantly, Natsu was in Gray's face in a flash. "Igneel was the best teacher ever!" he growled defensively.

Gray scoffed. "Yeah, well then it probably his _student_ who had ash for brains-"

"You wanna take that back, ice _freak_?"

"Is that the best you've got, you dolt of stupendous proportions?"

A pause. A quirked eyebrow. "_What_?"

Gray raised a hand to brush his shoulder in triumph - only to find that his shirt was absent. Together, the two mages looked down at Gray's bare chest.

Natsu snorted. "Exhibitionist."

"You wanna go, Natsu?"

The aforementioned boy simpy delivered a right hook to his partner's face in response. Subsequently, all hell broke loose.

From the bar, Lucy sighed fondly. They were a bunch of idiots, but they were _her_ idiots.

She wasn't aware that she had stated this aloud until Mirajane handed her a cup of amber liquid wth an evil glint in her bright blue eyes. Lucy had only seen that look once before, when she had assisted Mira in locking Gajeel and Levy in the broom closet.

It was, frankly put, terrifying.

And she'd marveled at Mira picking fights with Erza. Ps_shaw_.

"It's their way of showing that they care, you know," Mira said slyly, her elbows on the bar, supporting her head, as she peered into Lucy's face.

Oh, the nostalgia. "Mira, didn't you tell me Natsu was in love with me before-_when he wasn't_? So you've gotta be wrong," Lucy said, almost pleadingly.

Mira smiled a little darkly, the innocence fleeing from her face. "I didn't say Natsu's name."

A pause, in which Cana looked up from her binging (seriously. it was nine in the freaking morning. just - really?) to give Lucy the once-over before letting out a little laugh.

"_What_?" Lucy asked impatiently, exasperated with the whole freaking guild this morning, not to mention extremely red-faced from her slip-up.

"Oh, you've got it _bad_," she said with a hazy smile on her face, before picking up a new barrel of alcohol. Lucy spluttered indignantly as Mira simply grinned brightly, the innocence restored to her features.

"You are so _cute_!" the ex-S class mage squealed happily. "So what's it going to be, Lucy? Either I can set you guys up here or I can get Gray and Erza to do it when you go out on a mission-"

"Eh? Wait, _no_! He's so _clueless_. He'd never get it-"

Another bright smile. "We'll make him see," Mirajane said, happily planning their future wedding in her head.

Lucy groaned before ducking her head into her hands, a blush dusting across her cheeks. The world wouldn't leave her alone today, would it? All she wanted to do was slam her head into the bar. Repeatedly. Because there was _kindasortamaybe_ a vision of her and Natsu stuck in her head, holding hands under the table as they shared a drink in a coffee shop somewhere in her mind, and oh _God_, his eyes were so pretty and they were boring into hers, and he was leaning closer and closer until their noses skimmed and they were practically breathing the same air-

"Lucy? _Lucy_? Are you okay? You look like you're burning up!" said a frantic voice from above her. She looked up, and immediately wished she hadn't. The boy of her fantasies - _Natsu _- was inches away from her hot face. Why wasn't he fighting with Gray and generally wreaking havoc, like he was _supposed_ to be doing? No; instead, he was peering down at her concernedly, an adorable expression playing on his handsome features.

Wait. Wait, wait_, wait_.

She had just associated Natsu with the words 'handsome' and 'adorable'.

So she did the only thing her fuzzy brain allowed her to do. She ducked her head into the cool wood of the bar - injuring her forehead in the process - and covered her it with her hands as she let out a muffled scream.

"Lucy, you're being really weird," said Happy worriedly, who had somehow appeared out of nowhere_. _Through the gaps between her fingers, Lucy saw Natsu attempt to look up at the cat perched on his head before nodding in agreement.

"Nothing's wrong with Lucy!" Mirajane interrupted cheerfully, handing Natsu a glass of something that was on fire_. _Lucy let out a breath she didn't know she was holding as she watched Natsu chug the contents of the cup. For a moment, she thought she was saved. And then-

"But just to be sure, could you walk her home and take care of her for a little? Until she gets better?"

Lucy peeked up from her hands. Mira had that slightly evil expression on her face, and Natsu just looked plain confused.

She heaved a weary sigh. That (according Gray) dolt of stupendous proportions would _never_ get girls.


	2. Chapter 3

**Title: **The Nakodo's apprentice.  
><strong>Summary: <strong>Keepin' it legal. Sort of.  
><strong>Notes: <strong>My take on a stereotypical plot. I don't really like this one, but who knows? _You _might. So...tired.../yawns/

**Disclaimer: **Not mine, except for storyline. Plagiarize and die.

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"So," Lucy slides her glass across the bar to Mirajane, who immediately refills it and pushes it back. "I haven't talked to you in a while, Mira."

Mirajane nods as she hums softly, wiping cups with a worn rag. "Yes, it's been a while, hasn't it?" she agrees. "How have you been, Lucy?"

"Pretty good, actually." Lucy's voice is unusually hoarse. Startled, Mirajane looks up from her polishing and into Lucy's haggard face. She frowns slightly, noting the dark circles under her eyes and the sickly pallor her face has taken on.

"Liar." Erza parks herself on the stool next to Lucy, who turns away with a childish pout on her face. Erza nods to Mirajane, who passes her a mug of her own.

"I am _not_ a liar," mutters Lucy sullenly. "My landlord's just being an-_argh_!"

Mira presses her slim fingers to her lips, attempting to hold back a smile.

Erza raises her eyebrows as she surveys the younger girl. "What do you mean by that?"

Lucy looks ominously close to tears as she inhales deeply, and begins to ramble. "I get home yesterday, and there's a piece of paper freaking _taped_ to the _door_. Do you know how _un-classy _that is? Who _does _that? Anyway, I have, like, one week to _get out_, because I didn't have enough money for rent. And I have _nowhere to go_, because who the hell knows how long scraping together 70,000 jewels is gonna take?"

Silence, during which Lucy sniffs miserably and stares down into her drink, feeling more alone than she has in a while.

So she jumps when she feels a hand clenched on her shoulder, and looks up into the serious face of Erza.

"Lucy, this is what a guild is for," the older girl says firmly. "We help each other out because we'e _nakama_-practically a family, right?"

Lucy gives a watery chuckle. "Thanks, Erza."

Above her, Mirajane lets out a small gasp, as if she's having an epiphany.

Erza gives Mirajane a curious look. "What is it, Mira?"

But Mirjane shakes her head, because she's been struck with the most brilliant idea _ever _and _oh God why didn't she think of this sooner_?

Mirajane is wearing one of the strangest expressions Lucy's seen-a mix of glee and thoughtfulness, laced with an uncharacteristic mischeviousness she's never seen before.

"_Natsu_!"

Lucy is making desperate eyes at her, and she can't help up let out a gleeful giggle. "Just _wait_."

The fire mage looks up from his meal, halfway down the bar. "Eh?" Mirajane waves him over, and he's there in less than a second, Happy trailing behind him.

"What is it, Mira?"

Mirajane's smile disappears alarmingly quickly. "Natsu," she booms in a tone she never knew she possessed, "_Have you been neglecting your teammate_?"

Natsu's terrified whimper is made even funnier by a roll of Happy's eyes. Because that damn cat knows _exactly_ what she's planning.

"What is this I hear," at this point she jerks Lucy into Natsu's face, "about _Lucy_ not being able to pay her rent?"

"How is this_ his_ responsibility?" Lucy whisper-pleads, but Mirajane just ignores her.

"His destructive tendencies _do_ cost us most of the reward money on missions," Erza offers helpfully, and Lucy squeaks her protest. There's no _winning_ with these people.

Natsu is still shaking slightly, but there's no terror etched on his face, and _where's the fun in that_? "I-I'm really sorry, Lucy," he falters. "We can do another mission-?"

"_No_. Natsu, then the cycle repeats. There's no use in that," Erza says, just as _assertively_ as Mirajane.

Mirajane props her head on her fisted hand, elbow supported by the bar. "You know what? Never mind. Can you just take her in for a little?" Her voice has changed back to her normal one, sweet and subtley persuasive. There's a sunny smile where it should be, becasue too much terror was _always_ a bad thing.

The fire mage looks rather relieved, she decides, before she pushes a protesting Lucy into his chest. She does an internal victory dance at her steadily reddening face.

"Come on, Luce! Let me show you where..." his vocie fades away as he drags a loudly objecting Lucy out of the guild, probably to his apartment. Happy shadows him out, stopping at the door to give Mirajane a look that says he knows _everything_.

She sighs contentedly, _another job well done_, before going back to wiping mugs.

"Poor Lucy," Erza mutters sympathetically.

Mirajane nods, happy.

"How do you _know_ these things?" Erza asks, mildly impressed. Because it seems impossible, doesn't it? Guessing at another's feelings. Knowing _exactly_ what was going on inside someone's head.

"What do you mean?" Mirajane asks, innocent as usual. "Lucy just needed a place to stay-"

"-and she could've stayed with me in the girls' dorm," Erza finishes, raising an eyebrow expectantly.

Mirajane simply shrugs. "I guess I didn't think of that."

Erza nods, because she doesn't _do_ feelings and couple-y things and _matchmaking-_

That's when cold realization washes over her, chilling her like frosty winter breezes.

"That's what you were trying to do."

The corners of her friend's mouth turns down. "What do you mean?" she asks again.

"Lucy _likes_ Natsu as _more_ than a friend. You were _matchamking."_

"And you could be next," Mirajane says sweetly, patting her arm in what she takes to be a reassuring manner. But she feels strangely nauseous, looking up into Mirajane's glinting eyes.

She wants to tell her _don't you dare_, but she knows there's no point in trying to stop her. Becasue that girl is a freaking force of nature when she wants to be.

Erza briefly wonders if she had something on Lucy, some sort of blackmail that would force her to _just go with it_.

She supposes she'll never know.

This doesn't help her dread, and she slowly edges away from Mirajane's bright smile. _This guild does things to people_, she thinks, before sliding her mug to Mirajane and walking away from the bar at as normal a pace as possible.

Behind her, Mirajane taps her chin thoughtfully, and begins planning.

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><p>Reviews are much appreciated!<p> 


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